Tari Ito & Swing MASA

by RubberTit

カテゴリ:Thoughts about my pe( 1 )

Thoughts about my performance

Thoughts about my performance by Swing MASA

What it means to be “me” and the message of my jazz music, “Don’t Kill”:
My performance is for the recovery of “myself,” the me that is shrinking in this era of backlash
and the rise of conservatism.
Who am I?
When 9/11 happened, I was at my home in Harlem, in New York City. I saw the shocking
images on TV at my local grocery store. I watched television at my friend’s house every day in
search of the truth about the incident. The TV stations had stopped broadcasting all regular
programming and commercials, and showed only the incident. During those three days of
watching broadcasts about the incident, I grew frightened. I was afraid of the media’s
manipulative depictions of everyone in the world as being supportive of a war of revenge. And
then there was the me who was so afraid of the television’s propaganda that I couldn’t even
express my true feelings of opposition to the war. I stopped watching television after that.
Who am I?
I don’t know. But I can say this much for sure:
Whatever the age, whatever happens in front of my eyes, whatever, whenever,
I am the person who signed on to living the life of SwingMASA.
I am the only person who is with her from the beginning to the end of her life.
Who am I?
One morning, I found within me “Maa-chan,” a me inside myself, crying; my young child self.
I asked her why she was crying, and “Maa-chan” said “I am scared because I am always being
scolded by MASA.” ...
I felt love for this very young “Maa-chan” who was inside me. I was sorry for her. …
I wasn’t being kind and gentle to myself at all. I was only worried about producing results.
Now, I am afraid of this war for “justice.” I hate this war!!
Who am I?
Five years after 9/11, people have started to understand why it happened.
People around the world do not fear another 9/11-type incident itself, but they are truly scared of
this war for “justice” by the United States.
The Star-Spangled Banner and the Hi-no-maru (Japan’s Rising Sun Flag) are eating away at the
peace inside me.
Who am I?
Here are some decisions that I have made since I reached the age of 40:
That I don’t blame the me who has made mistakes.
That I forgive the me who has failed.
That I understand the me who is a hopelessly narcissistic coward, a little more.
That I accept everything about me.
That I love and have become the best friend of myself.
That I love, respect, and care for me.
That I love me even if my growth and happiness do not come true in the ways I wish.
That I will never give up on myself based on my viewpoint, even though people treat me badly,
And that I will be the me who I would like to spend the rest of my life with.
I will listen to the voice of my mind, I will walk with my own rhythm and tempo.
Just a little courage is enough. With a little courage, I will never forget to express myself,
in order for me to be myself.
My sexuality and me: liberation from the spell of sexuality:
I fall in love with people regardless of their gender.
The history of my own sexual experiences: I used to be heterosexual because it was the only way
I knew of, because of social norms. Then one day, I realized I had become a lesbian. I am not
interested in men, and I’m not good at dealing with hyper-masculine or hyper-feminine types.
Romantic love for me is about how I can construct a human relationship, rather than that
person’s sex and gender. While I was undergoing counseling, I became interested in this person
called “me.” I had a tough time figuring out how to live with this difficult self, but.nowadays,
I've gotten pretty friendly with her.
I have enjoyed being single for about fifteen years.
It's beginning to seem that my sexuality is about playing SwingMASA. Could it be? That's what
it feels like.
I want to go on fighting homophobia.
Performance—self-realization—the moment of supreme happiness
by rubbertit | 2007-03-29 17:53 | Thoughts about my pe